Now is the time to talk to your kids about the Paris attacks

1. 1.       Read the text and match each paragraph with the corresponding headline. One headline does not match any paragraph. The first one has been done for you.

Now is the time to talk to your kids about the Paris attacks

My seven-year-old figured out what was happening pretty quickly, so I told my five-year-old: “Some bad people attacked a small number of people in Paris. The police are on it. It is very sad.”

High school kids are both easier and harder: they will know what has happened, so parents need to find the time and space to discuss the issues surrounding it: racism, religion, extremism, ethics, politics.

With younger, school-aged children, parents need to offer age-appropriate information and stay calm.

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The worst thing to say to a child who says: “I am scared” is to respond, “there is no reason to be scared.”

Acknowledge their fear or sadness while looking for ways to make them feel safe.

“If they’re scared, say ‘Lots of kids and even adults feel scared.” writes Ellen Hendrikson on Savvy Psychologist. Acknowledging your own fear, or sadness, shows it is okay to be scared.

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Ask kids “what have you heard about what happened in Paris?” and then let them talk. If it’s nothing, you can choose whether to fill in the void so they have a grounding when it comes up. “For kids this age [6-11], knowledge can be empowering and helps relieve anxiety,” Koplewicz told Time.

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Kids love learning about the police when they are little because they inherently believe in authority. Mention all the people in their lives who can protect them: teachers, coaches, babysitters, grandparents, police, security guards, soldiers. If they are suddenly scared to leave you, talk about all the times you have been separated and then reunited. Ask them what would make them feel safe and talk about heroes to counterbalance stories of terrorists.

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Kids love to divide the world into good guys and bad guys. After an event like Paris, it is important to contextualize the bad guys for what they are: a tiny minority.

Over the weekend, a French youth magazine, Astrapi, published a special leaflet to help children aged 7-11. It instructed kids that the majority of Muslims loved peace as much as they do. “These ultraviolent people have nothing to do with the majority of Muslims, who live their faith peacefully,” the leaflet says. “They are attacking France because it’s a free country.” In another cartoon, a small boy says that terrorism scares him. The little girl responds: “But liberty scares the terrorists even more.”

Adapted from Quatz Magazine.

http://qz.com/551135/now-is-the-time-to-talk-to-your-kids-about-the-paris-attacks/

1. 1.       Teach them the broad lesson they need to learn
2. 2.       Ask open-ended questions
3. 3.       Remind them about the security all around them
4. 4.       Give the kids an accurate description of the events
5. 5.       Now is the time to talk to your kids about the Paris attacks
6. 6.       Validate their feelings